You have been everything to me. You were my strength and my foundation. Your patience, caring nature, and selflessness filled my heart and compensated for all of dad's shortcomings. Because of you I found the endurance and patience to bear dad's indifference for you never failed to remind us not to hold any grudges and more importantly you never failed to show those values,itself.
True, you wanted everything to be easy for us that you pampered and tolerated us to the point that we were spoiled. You never demanded, rather you always leave us options and choose to plead. You are an epitome of a selfless mother. Kind, patient, enduring, understanding... God,how I deeply regretted closing myself from you while you were struggling to reach out to me. I was but an immature daughter back then. Stubborn, narrow-minded, and selfish. I didnt know any better than think about myself while you, on the other hand, continued loving me nonetheless. I felt your love and Im deeply grateful for that. Im just sorry that I didnt get the chance to reciprocate them in the same unconditional way. But Im more sorry that I wasnt the mature person that Im now back then. If I was, then there would probably be no regrets. I was so self-assured that you would live by my side forever that I didnt bother telling you how I feel. I was afraid that I'd sound corny, and I thought I had all the time in the world.
But I was wrong.
Reality came crashing down on me so abrupt, so forceful I felt like dying with you. You were suffering an illness so it's normal for me to anticipate the possible truth that might eventuate sooner or later. But I didnt coz I refuse to. So I didnt mind. Until reality hit me that I mind. I was in total despondency and despair though it didnt show. I just kept it all inside til I felt like breaking down.
I should've told you everything; that I love you, that Im sorry, and that I may not have been expressive, but inside you mean the whole world to me. I should've made the most of your time here bonding with you. I should've changed myself to someone better and mature while you were alive. But what was done, is done. I cant change the past but I can always change the future..
Look at me now,mommy. I have grown, I've struggled to live a normal life without you. It was hard, but I got into the process. In fact, I've learned to do household chores quite efficiently and with less complains. I've started to open my mind and think of others. Though not all the time, but that's a good headstart,right? As long as I learn to balance everything then things would go on smoothly.
True,when you left I was inconsolable. But i managed to move on and live life like you wanted; cheerful and strong. I learned a lot from you and kept all those learnings fresh in my mind and in my heart. It's what motivated me to push through, though hard. What I am now and what I will become, I owe it all to you. You may have left physically, but your love and memories will linger on.
I love you, til we meet again...
True, you wanted everything to be easy for us that you pampered and tolerated us to the point that we were spoiled. You never demanded, rather you always leave us options and choose to plead. You are an epitome of a selfless mother. Kind, patient, enduring, understanding... God,how I deeply regretted closing myself from you while you were struggling to reach out to me. I was but an immature daughter back then. Stubborn, narrow-minded, and selfish. I didnt know any better than think about myself while you, on the other hand, continued loving me nonetheless. I felt your love and Im deeply grateful for that. Im just sorry that I didnt get the chance to reciprocate them in the same unconditional way. But Im more sorry that I wasnt the mature person that Im now back then. If I was, then there would probably be no regrets. I was so self-assured that you would live by my side forever that I didnt bother telling you how I feel. I was afraid that I'd sound corny, and I thought I had all the time in the world.
But I was wrong.
Reality came crashing down on me so abrupt, so forceful I felt like dying with you. You were suffering an illness so it's normal for me to anticipate the possible truth that might eventuate sooner or later. But I didnt coz I refuse to. So I didnt mind. Until reality hit me that I mind. I was in total despondency and despair though it didnt show. I just kept it all inside til I felt like breaking down.
I should've told you everything; that I love you, that Im sorry, and that I may not have been expressive, but inside you mean the whole world to me. I should've made the most of your time here bonding with you. I should've changed myself to someone better and mature while you were alive. But what was done, is done. I cant change the past but I can always change the future..
Look at me now,mommy. I have grown, I've struggled to live a normal life without you. It was hard, but I got into the process. In fact, I've learned to do household chores quite efficiently and with less complains. I've started to open my mind and think of others. Though not all the time, but that's a good headstart,right? As long as I learn to balance everything then things would go on smoothly.
True,when you left I was inconsolable. But i managed to move on and live life like you wanted; cheerful and strong. I learned a lot from you and kept all those learnings fresh in my mind and in my heart. It's what motivated me to push through, though hard. What I am now and what I will become, I owe it all to you. You may have left physically, but your love and memories will linger on.
I love you, til we meet again...
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